So, the last time I posted on my blog, I talked about the hills I wanted to be dying on this fall. I wrote the post months ago, during the summer when my only concern was how the pool would fit into our nap schedule. The weather was scorching, the kids wore their bathing suits all the time, and I was spending my time researching healthy recipes to put in their lunchbox, because I hadn't yet accepted the fact that they hate all things healthy the minute they leave this house.
Then came August. School started without many hitches. I was so worried that it would be too difficult to get three little girls dressed, fed, and out the door with lunchboxes and snacks in hand; these tasks all went much more smoothly than I could have anticipated. Just like always, though, things can only go smoothly for so long. Towards the end of August, my grandma went into hospice. She died on September 26. Every time I've tried to sit down and blog about the experience, it feels like any words that I can come up with are too much and not enough all at the same time. So for right now, that's enough about that.
But, I mentioned the past month to explain why I've had to let some of my hills go. The struggle is real, and the kids are doing well to get to school on time every day. Or to get there at all every day. We have paid plenty for them to all be enrolled in Tae Kwon Do, and I could count on one hand the number of times they've been since Grandma went into hospice. Even though it's great for them and they like it, I just can't seem to make it happen much lately. They haven't resumed their piano practice, and there have been several days that they got to school without their homework in their folder. In review, I think it would be safe to say I've let most of the hills go.
And yet, life goes on. They are still doing really well in school. We are still thriving at home, even though we are going on day 9 of being sick. When it's all said and done, the only thing we'll remember about this past month was how much extra time we got to spend with my mom and how things were kind of wacky, and that it was hard to watch Grandma go. It has taught the kids lessons that are tough but necessary; that sometimes death happens--even to people you know really, really well and care for. Sometimes grown-ups cry and let all their feelings out and say too much, and sometimes grown-ups would rather not talk about hard things. And all of that is okay. Sometimes you have to hold off on things that are good so that you can make sure to do what is necessary, and sometimes that's all you can do.
Even when we fall off the hills we thought we were dying on, we still have hope. Through all of this, I have been encouraged by Psalm 27:13 "Yet I am confident I will see the Lord's goodness while I am here in the land of the living."
Then came August. School started without many hitches. I was so worried that it would be too difficult to get three little girls dressed, fed, and out the door with lunchboxes and snacks in hand; these tasks all went much more smoothly than I could have anticipated. Just like always, though, things can only go smoothly for so long. Towards the end of August, my grandma went into hospice. She died on September 26. Every time I've tried to sit down and blog about the experience, it feels like any words that I can come up with are too much and not enough all at the same time. So for right now, that's enough about that.
But, I mentioned the past month to explain why I've had to let some of my hills go. The struggle is real, and the kids are doing well to get to school on time every day. Or to get there at all every day. We have paid plenty for them to all be enrolled in Tae Kwon Do, and I could count on one hand the number of times they've been since Grandma went into hospice. Even though it's great for them and they like it, I just can't seem to make it happen much lately. They haven't resumed their piano practice, and there have been several days that they got to school without their homework in their folder. In review, I think it would be safe to say I've let most of the hills go.
And yet, life goes on. They are still doing really well in school. We are still thriving at home, even though we are going on day 9 of being sick. When it's all said and done, the only thing we'll remember about this past month was how much extra time we got to spend with my mom and how things were kind of wacky, and that it was hard to watch Grandma go. It has taught the kids lessons that are tough but necessary; that sometimes death happens--even to people you know really, really well and care for. Sometimes grown-ups cry and let all their feelings out and say too much, and sometimes grown-ups would rather not talk about hard things. And all of that is okay. Sometimes you have to hold off on things that are good so that you can make sure to do what is necessary, and sometimes that's all you can do.
Even when we fall off the hills we thought we were dying on, we still have hope. Through all of this, I have been encouraged by Psalm 27:13 "Yet I am confident I will see the Lord's goodness while I am here in the land of the living."